Parenting a child must be beautiful and exhausting simultaneously from the day parenthood commences- From cleaning crap or barf coming out of a baby to tolerating tantrums, bowing down to wishes, taking them on expensive vacations, buying them gadgets, clean clothes, Xbox, sending them to school, if any of it is considered as a yardstick of being a good parent for you. Taking advantage of living in a democratic country as well as being a writer, I would like to share 10 practices that might lead to a better nurturing.
1. Free to make mistakes– Mistakes are opportunities to learn. Being open to them making mistakes is not enough, giving them confidence to come and tell you about their mistakes would be especially when they are seeking guidance.
2. Respect your other half- They learn to respect the world through your eyes. If you don’t respect the most important person in your life, how do you expect them to respect the differentiated cultures and perspectives we witness around us. They need you to respect your spouse irrespective of whether they are breadwinners or domestic in-charge. The differentiated admiration for the two work has already cost us Feminism and disorderly division of responsibility.
3. Earn points, wishes, cash from early childhood- Have them fix things in the house, or help a neighbor or house chores and give them reward for it. Let them learn a sense of worth and responsibility from adolescence.
4- Educational degrees are not more important than experiences- Educational degree/qualification might help you land a job but experiences make you wise also making it easier to be an entrepreneur. If every child while growing up can focus on the problems that we have in our times, those issues might not even prevail in the coming centuries.
5. Don’t teach, preach- You don’t want them to be influenced by media, some random hippie, or a neighbor. Influence them with your actions while they are around. You want them to be more aware of their actions, Be aware of your actions. You want them to respect good around, Respect good. You want them to help others, Help others.
6. Awareness of alternatives- Make them aware of the consequences/orientation of certain paths (they might choose) but don’t make those choices for them. Let them decide independently or collaboratively with you.
7. Put them in discomfort- Discomfort that cringes might be brutal for sometime but if channeled properly, there is a sure-short effect of the children hustling harder. Aid them become smooth in dealing with the tenderness. My 7 year old niece is very good at playing badminton, like unbeatable. My brother shifted her to another coaching institute where she was taken out of her comfort zone. She ended up crying 2 times in one week but her determination is flourishing.
8. Don’t treat them as commodities- Children are future citizens of our society who will be rulers of the next generation and also the youth. Try to inculcate qualities like responsibility, honesty, fair-mindedness, Integrity for a better 22nd century. These qualities can only be driven by experiences.
9. Don’t try to live your life via them– You may have had a desire to become a doctor, engineer, football player, go to the best university in the world, learn swimming or dancing. Give your children an option to become any of those but don’t try to live your life with their time by making it a compulsion. Instead it’s never too late to start living so go out there and learn to play football-just don’t break your leg.
10. Love them, don’t cage them– Freedom comes with responsibility and the true meaning of love lies in affection without restriction where the growth is gradual or steep but not saturated. A bird who has a desire to fly high will not be able to do it sitting in your gold-plated cage, We want confident innovative leaders to drive us and that can’t happen with you enclosing our chance.